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Walking Through Grief

  • Writer: randrson
    randrson
  • Sep 7, 2025
  • 3 min read

“What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” – Helen Keller


Grief is one of the most universal human experiences, and yet it feels profoundly personal when it happens to us. It can arrive after the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, the loss of independence, or even the unraveling of a dream. At Cascade Mind & Body Clinic, we see how deeply grief touches every part of our patients’ lives—mind, body, and spirit.

The Stages of Grief Are Not Linear


Many people are familiar with the five stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. But grief does not unfold in a straight line. You may skip a stage entirely, revisit a stage years later, or find yourself caught between two stages at once.

Anger, for example, can feel especially sharp. When I lost my grandfather, I wasn’t only grieving his absence—I was also angry at my family for the choices that limited his independence at the end of his life. That anger became a part of my grief, as real as the sadness.

It’s important to know that even if you have reached acceptance, a memory, anniversary, smell, or place can suddenly pull you back to anger or sadness years later. That doesn’t mean you’re “failing” at grieving—it means you are human.

Grief Takes Many Forms


Grief is not limited to death. We also grieve:

  • The loss of a business partner or trusted friend.

  • The betrayal of family members.

  • The loss of a dream or a future we had built for ourselves.

Each loss carries weight. Each experience is valid. And while people may urge you to “move on” or “get over it,” they may believe they’re helping, when in truth what you may need most is someone to hold space—to acknowledge that what you lost mattered.

How Grief Affects the Body and Daily Life


Grief doesn’t just live in our minds; it shows up in our bodies and in our daily routines:

In these moments, medication can help. Short-term support for sleep, anxiety, or mood may give your mind and body the rest they need so you can continue showing up for life’s basic tasks. Medication is not about “erasing grief”—it’s about making it possible to keep functioning while you heal.

Healing in the Short Term and Long Term


There is no single way to heal from grief. What helps in the early days may not be what sustains you years later. Both the short-term and the long-term matter.

In the short term:

  • Allow yourself permission to cry, rest, and step back.

  • Lean on your supports—friends, therapy, faith, community.

  • Use grounding skills when overwhelmed: deep breathing, naming five things you can see, or gentle movement.

In the long term:

  • Build routines that honor your loved one or loss (lighting a candle, journaling, annual rituals).

  • Continue healthy habits—exercise, balanced eating, consistent sleep—that steady your body as you carry grief.

  • Seek meaning: through writing, therapy, volunteering, or spiritual exploration.

Tools for Coping: CBT, DBT, and Motivational Interviewing


At Cascade Mind & Body Clinic, we often integrate therapy approaches to help people navigate grief:

  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): helps you identify and challenge unhelpful thoughts, such as “I should be over this by now,” and replace them with gentler truths.

  • Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): teaches mindfulness and distress tolerance—skills to manage the intensity of grief when it threatens to overwhelm you.

  • Motivational Interviewing (MI): focuses on your strengths and values, helping you clarify why continuing to live meaningfully matters to you, even as you grieve.


These approaches don’t take away the pain, but they can make the pain easier to carry.

Moving Forward with Compassion


With CompassionTime alone does not heal grief. Time creates distance, and in that distance life fills in with other responsibilities, joys, and distractions. But grief remains part of us.

The task of grieving is not to “get over it.” It is to learn how to move forward while carrying it—with compassion for ourselves, space for what hurts, and permission to find moments of peace again.

Resources & Support


If your grief is interfering with your ability to care for yourself or your family—if showering, eating, or getting out of bed feels impossible—know that help is available.

  • 📞 Cascade Mind & Body Clinic: 541-699-6128

  • 📞 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (24/7 free support)

  • 📞 Lines for Life (Oregon-based support for crisis, grief, and loss): 800-273-8255

Your grief is valid. Your healing is possible. You don’t have to carry the weight alone.


 
 
 

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